basilwhite

I wanna assemble a spec portfolio of speechwriting, so I'm looking for opportunities to write some speeches for notables in the DC area. I have a strong resume in both comedy writing and science writing. Any ideas?

My day is weird because I'm accidentally getting shipments of equipment delivered to my office instead of my home.

My day is stupid because I wanted to be productive today but everyone else has the day off.

My day is hard because I have to plan how to get these shipments home.

My day is scary because people say a snowstorm's coming.

Your turn.

Used "This I believe" as my mantra for performing.

It seems to work.

http://www.npr.org/thisibelieve/faq.html

Today I am grateful because:

I have more comedy material than I need for my show tonight.

I discovered comedy.

vikingsparrow is not only creative and productive with her creative output, she has taste. Productive creative output minus taste equals Mama's Family.

I own a cool black leather blazer.

I own Tivo.

I get to teach a comedy writing workshop that people want to attend.

My son is smart.

Join the mygratitudelist community and add yours!

Use Wikipedia to connect joke topics - Six Degrees of Wikipedia (http://tools.wikimedia.de/sixdeg/) connects paths between any two Wikipedia articles.

Looking for joke topics? Try the list of Wikipedia articles with the most revisions - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Mostrevisions

Death connects Terri Schiavo to Jesus.

Finding a better word for a joke:

I have a new joke with the word "war," but the word "war" doesn't fit the pacing, and isn't quite what I mean. It also rhymes with another line.

So I use Wikitionary's "What links here" link for the word "war."

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Special:Whatlinkshere/war

From this I get "pillage," a much closer word to what I mean, paces better, and doesn't rhyme.

This resource is my new thesaurus, because it includes associations that are different forms of speech whereas most old-school thesauri stick with the same form of speech as the referenced word.

Discuss.

Tried punctuating my speech with my hips last night. It seems to keep me in the moment, keeps me dancing to the music of my words.