April 18th, 2006

158IgnoreConsensusReality

Basil White's WeirdStupidHardScary for Today

I used to think old people were lazy, 'cos they don't get out as much. Now I know the older you get, the easier it is to identify something as a waste of time.

"Hey, let's go to the dance club." Are they giving away free money? No. Am I gonna get laid? Not likely. Well, then. I'm gonna stay here and sell grandma's valuables on eBay. Then I can buy sex. They deliver now.

"Don't you wanna get out of the house?" No. Dance clubs are for extroverts to go have a good time so their roommates can watch pornography. It's all part of the delicate balance of nature.