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Thu, Nov. 30th, 2006, 10:11 am
Our Stupid Power of Imagination

tags:standup comedy, schizophrenia, jungle fever, futurism, beans

Our Stupid Power of Imagination


I love science fiction, but I don't like how they get outta problems by inventing nonsense solutions that don't have anything to do with anything that's happened before. "We're getting our asses kicked. Let's teleport the food dispenser over to their cargo bay and flood them with peanuts." "Make it so." You can't get involved with the characters if they're gonna fantasize their way outta trouble. Okay, every once in a while the hot chick gets eaten by the tar monster, but what are the odds? You see that episode of Next Generation? It was called "Denise Crosby wants a pay raise." High point of the show.

Sci-fi teaches you that creative imagination solves problems. Good, if you invent something that works outside your own head. The guy who invented the cell phone got the idea from Star Trek. Inspired MRI machines, laser surgery, microscopic robots, ion propulsion, little tubes that connect parts of the space station, jungle fever, Star Trek showed us the way. That stuff is real. Aluminum cowboy hat does not make you invisible. For that you need tequila.

I wish life were like science fiction. I want the magical power of nonsense. "The cops are comin'. Put the refried beans in the microwave. The frijolion particles, will disrupt their onboard computer." And it would work. 'Cos I got condoms and self-help books I need to send back to the past. I ain't afraid'a Klingons. I got a toothpaste tube and a manhole cover. Let's dance!

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tags:standup comedy, schizophrenia, jungle fever, futurism, beans
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Our Stupid Power of Imagination
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I love science fiction, but I don't like how they get outta problems by inventing nonsense solutions that don't have anything to do with anything that's happened before. "We're getting our asses kicked. Let's teleport the food dispenser over to their cargo bay and flood them with peanuts." "Make it so." You can't get involved with the characters if they're gonna fantasize their way outta trouble. Okay, every once in a while the hot chick gets eaten by the tar monster, but what are the odds? You see that episode of Next Generation? It was called "Denise Crosby wants a pay raise." High point of the show.
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Sci-fi teaches you that creative imagination solves problems. Good, if you invent something that works outside your own head. The guy who invented the cell phone got the idea from Star Trek. Inspired MRI machines, laser surgery, microscopic robots, ion propulsion, little tubes that connect parts of the space station, jungle fever, Star Trek showed us the way. That stuff is real. Aluminum cowboy hat does not make you invisible. For that you need tequila.
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I wish life were like science fiction. I want the magical power of nonsense. "The cops are comin'. Put the refried beans in the microwave. The frijolion particles, will disrupt their onboard computer." And it would work. 'Cos I got condoms and self-help books I need to send back to the past. I ain't afraid'a Klingons. I got a toothpaste tube and a manhole cover. Let's dance!
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<a href="http://basilwhite.com/"">BasilWhite.com</a>
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